Hide and Seek

I've always hated being the girl who shed the most tears,
who seemed to be holding back the anger that swelled within

My past is full of hide and seek games,
me hiding how I truly felt in a pathetic attempt to see who cared enough to seek me out,
to find me...

All of this hiding and holding back just to blend in with the crowd,
with the smiles I will forever envy because they were always telling the truth.

Through the years the games and confusion are not extinct, but what scared me then, I've learned to handle now

I will never miss the constant fear I carried with me
The fear of the thoughts within my own head
The fear in my mother's tears
The fear in my brother's silence
The fear of feeling hopeless,
helpless, and
weak

I will never miss the tears,
the countless tears that could quench the thirst of millions
The tears that left a young girl with bloodshot eyes, and a burning red face of
despair,
confusion,
and exhaustion

Forever I will attempt to erase the memories,
the memories that have made me all that I am today...